The Commish

Hello, my name is Lou and I'm an alco... (wait, that's another place I need to be later today). Anyway, my name is Lou and I'm the Commish and the two-time reigning champion of the league (might as well give me your money right now). If you want to know my unbelievable strategy of superiority, simply send $25 to the address listed. Oh never mind, I'm feeling generous, so I'll share my thoughts with you for absolutely nothing. All I can say is you should follow these easy steps and you, too, can be highly successful in both fantasy football and life in general:

1. Draft any players in any position in any order you choose (as Timmy the Greek so brilliantly pointed out, this makes absolutely no difference whatsoever; so, go ahead, grab up nine available tight ends if you want).

2. Next, drink in moderation (I know this will be highly difficult and stressful for about half of you managers out there, but it's for your own good; come on, Bob, set a good example).

3. Now, simply get rid of all the crappy players you have that make your team seem kind of sucky, and replace them with far superior talent (there's always some brilliant strategist believing himself to be a great manager who doesn't know the subtle distinctions between football and squash; he'll trade with you).

4. And viola! You are now all set to become the new champion of the world.

All Hail to King Favre

In the words of Roland LaPrise, Charles Macak and Tafit Baker:

You put your whole self in,
You put your whole self out;
You put your whole self in,
And you shake it all about.
You do the Hokey-Pokey,
And you turn yourself around....

That's what it's all about, isn't it? After several weeks of the Packers doing the Hokey Pokey with Brett Favre and Packers fans, the dirty deed has been done and Brett is a New York Jet. Favre may be returning to the NFL in a green jersey, but a number of startling things have happened. John Madden's head has exploded, ESPN's programming has been set for the past month, and Viagra sales in New York are about to wane due to the excitement of Jets fans. But here's one thing that should also happen: Aaron Rodgers should ask to be traded.

Favre dispatched a number of text messages to Packers GM Ted Thompson, and Rodgers should be next in line with: "Wnt 2 b trded."

So, even though Favre isn't coming back to play in a Packers uniform, Rodgers should do himself a favor and ask out. He's in a lose-lose position anyway, because Pack fans will be sure to remind him over and over and over again that, in fact, he is not the Divine Quarterback of Green Bay and he never will be. Granted, the fourth-year QB didn't do himself any favors in a recent Sports Illustrated story by essentially telling his fans to get on board or take a hike, but he has since backtracked a bit.

One other thing to consider is this: it's just possible that Favre's season last year was a fluke? The previous two years, with Rodgers behind him, Favre was a below average QB, combining to throw 38 TD's compared to 47 interceptions while completing just 59% of his passes.

Favre had his time in the northern Wisconsin sun, and chose to end it. And for the sake of Aaron Rodgers' career, let's hope he does what he can to end the charade and get the hell out of Dodge before the townfolk consider riding him off on a rail.

Still, rather than rehashing everything that has been said, printed, argued, whispered, and blogged about this fiasco, The Commish will focus on what this means to us fantasy football owners the world over. So listen up...

1. What does this mean to the value of Packer fantasy players?
All of the rankings prior to Brett's potential return were based on his staying retired, so my advice is to evaluate all Packer players based upon their pre-season ranking and performance.

2. What exactly is Brett Favre's fantasy value?
Let's see just how quickly Brett and the Jet's receiving corps gel over the next few weeks of pre-season. The Commish's opinion is that Brett should be ranked around #15 unless his pre-season performance is absolutely outstanding. Keep in mind that, other than the Patriots, Favre will face Miami and Buffalo twice each enroute to the leagues 25th easiest schedule overall.

3. How does this impact the Jets receiver corps value?
As of today Laveranues Coles and Jericho Cotchery are ranked (according to Yahoo) as #26 and #30 respectively in this year's wide receiver draft. I don't think that Favre's arrival will move them up 10 positions with the likes of Hines Ward, Dwayne Bowe and Greg Jennings. I would, however, suggest that you can all feel comfortable (or uncomfortable, perhaps) moving one or the other up 4 or 5 slots with Lee Evan and Calvin Johnson. Meanwhile, TE Chris Baker and rookie TE Dustin Keller could be huge beneficiaries of Favre's arrival. Baker may be used more for blocking, while Keller is not even a decent run or pass blocking TE, but his hands and above-average quickness are attractive. Keller is currently ranked as the 36th rated TE but The Commish has no problem moving him up 10 to 20 Slots with the likes of Alge Crumpler and Vernon Davis. Keller has been compared to a young fellow roster mate and former Packer Bubba Franks.

4. How does the Farve trade impact the Jets running game?
The Commish believed that Thomas Jones was a 2008 sleeper and with Favre under center he should clearly be on many Clowntown Clan owners' radar. Defenses won't be able to pack the box to stop the run with Farve under center, so Jones should find room to run between a greatly upgraded offensive line. Leon Washington will also get his shots at rushing the ball.

5. How will the Jets overall season turn out?
Playing the 25th easiest schedule is just what the doctor ordered for the Jets, who were actually vastly improved without Farve. The Jets are in a weak division (other than the "perfect" Patriots) and face the Raiders and Chiefs who ranked at the bottom of their division. I predict that: the Jets won't make the playoffs. Still, The Commish seriously thinks they could approach the .500 mark.