Holy crap! Play offs already? Where did this year go? A better question is how the hell did half these Managers make it into the play offs? I mean common! The Hopheads, LBNL & my Heros haven’t even broke 1,000 total points yet! As a matter of fact, between these three teams only one team scored over 100 points in one game. I won’t say who that was because his head may grow bigger than a melon and I’ll never hear the end of it. Then you look at the Molesters who had a heartbreak of a loss in week 13 to the Nonads which knocked him out of the playoffs. Molesters is the one odd man out that did break 1000 points in our regular season. The shame of it all.
So just how did each team make it into the playoffs? Let’s see now….
In first place is the Boozers who ruled most all year. He is legit even though he tanked 4 in a row at the end of the season. Curse of the bling Dude! Curse of the bling! I know you think you foiled the curse last week Boozers but we all know it was a fluke.
In second place is the Hopheads. I think the Potheads is more like it when you look at his lineup. Just how the hell did he finish 9-4? I don’t get it. If any of you have that one figured out feel free to chime in because I am clueless! Let’s just call this one what it is…sloppy seconds!
Hoppy, here is a new avitar for you.
Third place is the Brew Crew. This guy stayed pretty consistent all year. Awfully impressive for a rookie. Things really came together for him after he dumped all those Buffalo players. It didn’t take him long to learn that being a homie is a poor strategy. Hell, I’m in my third year of fantasy football and I have yet to learn that lesson. Guess I am as dumb as I look. Any way I have to admit the Brew crew is legit as well.
Fourth place is the Shysters. Anyone that lost to the Blues is just plain lucky to be alive. I know I would have jumped off the tallest building in Dallas had that happened to me. I’m gonna call this one as I see it. Mob influence.
Fifth place is my Homers Heros. Ok, Ok, I’ll be the first to admit it. This was just plain ugly! I won ugly. Let’s see just how far that ugly takes me.
Sixth place is the Nimrods. Now the Nimrods did break 1000. Yeah, by 1/2 point so that doesn’t count. He also managed to hit exactly 100 one week. Can’t call it breaking 100 but he did hit it. Better than I can say for myself. Lou had to sweat this one all season. Especially in the last couple weeks. Nimrods managed to make it by a hair on his chinny, chin, chin. He wiggled his way into the playoffs. Didn’t know a pumpkin butt could wiggly so well.
Seventh place is LBNL. He was pretty consistent in his scoring. Surprising seeing that he had such a titty baby of a QB. Due to that he eeked his way into the playoffs. I’ll bet he is still thanking the fantasy gods that he had me for his final matchup. If it weren’t for that he never would have made it. We will call this one what it is. Friggin lucky!
Eighth place and the final playoff slot went to the Gougers. This is easy to see. He pulled that one out of his ass and shoved it up the Molesters. To the Molesters that is what he calls going out in style! Gougers tripped into the playoffs!
Now what happened to the other 4 teams that didn’t make it?
The Molesters just blew his load.
The Demons were cursed all year. No more running with the Devil for him.
The Nonads had a horrible draft and never could recover from that.
The Blues never had a prayer.
On to the Predictions…
Boozers VRS the Gougers:
First thing is first….what have the yahoo geeks been smoking? The Gougers are projected for over 100 points this week! Yeah, he does have some favorable matchups but I’m going to call this one now. Detroit will get their first win against Minnesota this week and that will be what keeps you from breaking that 100 points Gougers! I know, I know, you all think I’m crazy. And it is calls like that got me laughed right out of the news room but wait and see folks. Wait and see.
Even with that prediction I still believe in the curse of the bling. Boozers, your going down in week one. Sorry Bubba.
Prediction: Gougers by 3
By the way Boozers you get first place as far as team names go. That one is a classic. I would stick with it for next season if I were you. As a matter of fact you influenced me. I think I may join the crowd. I was thinking of changing my team name to the Lucky Lushes for next season.
Fourth place is the Shysters. Anyone that lost to the Blues is just plain lucky to be alive. I know I would have jumped off the tallest building in Dallas had that happened to me. I’m gonna call this one as I see it. Mob influence.
Fifth place is my Homers Heros. Ok, Ok, I’ll be the first to admit it. This was just plain ugly! I won ugly. Let’s see just how far that ugly takes me.
Sixth place is the Nimrods. Now the Nimrods did break 1000. Yeah, by 1/2 point so that doesn’t count. He also managed to hit exactly 100 one week. Can’t call it breaking 100 but he did hit it. Better than I can say for myself. Lou had to sweat this one all season. Especially in the last couple weeks. Nimrods managed to make it by a hair on his chinny, chin, chin. He wiggled his way into the playoffs. Didn’t know a pumpkin butt could wiggly so well.
Seventh place is LBNL. He was pretty consistent in his scoring. Surprising seeing that he had such a titty baby of a QB. Due to that he eeked his way into the playoffs. I’ll bet he is still thanking the fantasy gods that he had me for his final matchup. If it weren’t for that he never would have made it. We will call this one what it is. Friggin lucky!
Eighth place and the final playoff slot went to the Gougers. This is easy to see. He pulled that one out of his ass and shoved it up the Molesters. To the Molesters that is what he calls going out in style! Gougers tripped into the playoffs!
Now what happened to the other 4 teams that didn’t make it?
The Molesters just blew his load.
The Demons were cursed all year. No more running with the Devil for him.
The Nonads had a horrible draft and never could recover from that.
The Blues never had a prayer.
On to the Predictions…
Boozers VRS the Gougers:
First thing is first….what have the yahoo geeks been smoking? The Gougers are projected for over 100 points this week! Yeah, he does have some favorable matchups but I’m going to call this one now. Detroit will get their first win against Minnesota this week and that will be what keeps you from breaking that 100 points Gougers! I know, I know, you all think I’m crazy. And it is calls like that got me laughed right out of the news room but wait and see folks. Wait and see.
Even with that prediction I still believe in the curse of the bling. Boozers, your going down in week one. Sorry Bubba.
Prediction: Gougers by 3
By the way Boozers you get first place as far as team names go. That one is a classic. I would stick with it for next season if I were you. As a matter of fact you influenced me. I think I may join the crowd. I was thinking of changing my team name to the Lucky Lushes for next season.
Nimrods VRS the Brew Crew:
Here is another one that blows me away. The Nimrods projected at 93? Those Yahoo’s are hitting the hooch aren’t they? The Brew Crew are also projected to break 90 but I can see that. Lou, I hate to say it but the Brew Crew will slip on a Trojan and stick it to you.
Prediction: Brew Crew by 9
Here is another one that blows me away. The Nimrods projected at 93? Those Yahoo’s are hitting the hooch aren’t they? The Brew Crew are also projected to break 90 but I can see that. Lou, I hate to say it but the Brew Crew will slip on a Trojan and stick it to you.
Prediction: Brew Crew by 9
Gonna get a spankin
Hopheads VRS LBNL:
Oh boy this is an exciting matchup! Not! That is sarcasm LBNL. Let me put it in terms you can understand. I’m blowing smoke up you butt!
This matchup has some stupid projections also. Arron Rodgers projected at 18! Aw give me a break! I know they are up against Houston but 18? Common! There is no way. I’ll bet he just barely gets 10!
This matchup is not a question of who will win it. It is a question of who will suck worse! Now if you go by the history of these two teams this season we have LBNL who has been real good at tanking the ones he should win and Hoppy has been real lucky at getting teams on their worst week. But this is the playoffs and I see the tide turning on that.
Prediction: LBNL by 5
The Shysters VRS my Heros:
I have a real good feeling that my Cowboys are going to show up big time and put the hurt on the Stealers. Romo will out score big Ben by at least 7. This will make a big difference in our matchup. Unfortunately with Barber out and the fact that the rest of my team is a bunch of scrubs, I’m doomed.
Prediction: Shysters by 3
1 comment:
Romo will out score Big Ben by at least 7? In a pig's eye! Care to wager on that? If Romo outscores my QB, then I'll send you a real Chicago pizza.
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