Week 6 Predictions

WEEK 6 PREDICTIONS

Well, let’s face it folks. The Cowboys are on a bye this week so football won’t even be worth watching. Might as well just bench all our players and call it a wash. C’mon Brew Crew, go for it!

Last week I ragged on the pitiful play of last years studs. The player output of week 5 did absolutely nothing to sway my position. However, can I say they alone are to blame? Duh! Of course not. An overwhelming majority of these guys are coached or have owners that ride the Maulers short bus. Some even have the built in tandem excuse. An idiot owner and dip shit coach! Now who could I be talking about you ask.

Let’s see now… We have the Raiders. Their owner has got to be the biggest punk in all of the NFL which may explain why his head coach beats the tar out of his coordinators and his team line up resembles San Quintin D block

The Browns are another class act. It’s a no wonder they can’t even get 30 yards in pass completions against the lowly Bills. Who the hell let’s a pro bowl T.E. go with no viable replacement then waits until game day of week 1 to announce their starting QB only to change it a couple weeks latter and tops it off with trading the only starting WR on their roster?

My Cowboys have a control freak for an owner, a cupcake for a coach and a red headed stepchild for an offensive coordinator! Now don’t get me wrong. I actually believe Jerry Jones is a great owner. He pays his players well. He has a deep desire to win and wants to do all he can to put together a winning team (not that he does). He built an incredible new stadium and he knows how to sell. He just makes a terrible manager. He needs to do like every owner should .. pay the money to get the players, get a top shelf coach, let that coach run the team then sit back and shut the hell up. Oh yeah, and keep your ugly ass kids out of the front office. They don’t know squat either!

Then we have the Rams. They might as well let Rush buy the team. I doubt that could get any worse. Actually I think it would be very appropriate. A team that blows owned by a blowhard!

The Redskins… tightwad owner…wannabe coach. The Panthers owners are an entire family of pampered, spoiled ass rich kids that are feuding which has had absolutely disastrous effects on that team. Tampa… aw hell, who cares! Detroit …. Not wasting my time. The Bills are going to Canada soon so who gives a crap any more. ‘Eh? KC is one more fine example.

Folks be prepared. This is going to be the lowest output in the history of fantasy football. Our winners will not be determined by who has the best studs. It is a question of which players suck less.

On to the predictions.

Poopflinger VRS Maulers:
Can the Poopflingers pull another one outta his ass? I think the Maulers are good competition but the fact is Poopflingers isn’t just full of crap. This guy has a golden spoon up his butt this year. The deciding factor will be Schaub. How well will he perform? If he throws for at leat 2 TD’s the game will be Poopflingers. If not, the maulers will be scraping you off his shoes Lou.
Prediction: Poopflingers win by 3

Boozers VRS LBNL:
Take a look at my smack talk in this match up. Pan up to the top and start from the beginning. You will see what I think of that LBNL line up.
Prediction: Boozers crush LBNL by 14 or more

Gougers VRS Morons:
Bob tells me he is going to go into the playoffs with the worst record and lowest score. I believe it! Well at least I buy half of it. Wanna guess which half I buy?
Prediction: Gougers win this big. 15 or more


Shmartipants VRS Birdbrains:
Dave, you are thick headed aren’t you? Man, it is a collective agreement in the league. You gotta change that friggin name. And that avatar has gotta go too. People are starting to talk about you bud.
Birdbrains has been formidable. The projections shown you beating Chitown by a good margin. However, I think you’re a fluke. A mistake. Just plain unnatural. Good things must come to an end and your time has come
Prediction:
Chitown wins by 7

Demons VRS Blues:
Who can tell for sure? Demons has half his roster empty. Well, actually history tells no lies. Full roster or half roster, this is still easy to call. Robert, your ass is grass.
Prediction: Blues win by 10 or more

Brew Crew VRS my Twisters:
If it looks like shit, smells like shit then it must be shit. What else can I say
Prediction: Brew Crew wins by 7